What is Hesitation Costing You?
Hesitation is a silent thief that robs us of our time, opportunities, and potential. It creeps in when we least expect it, whispering doubts and fears that hold us back from taking action. In this article, we will explore the true cost of hesitation and how embracing a mindset of being a “DO-ER” can transform your life.
In this video, I will share how hesitation costed me an opportunity that I can never get back.
Through personal anecdotes and practical insights, you’ll discover why hesitation can be so damaging and how you can overcome it to live a more purposeful and impactful life. Whether you struggle with fear, self-doubt, or procrastination, this guide will empower you to flick hesitation off your shoulder and step boldly into your calling.
This moment perfectly illustrates how hesitation can paralyze us. It’s not just about missing a speech; it’s about missing the chance to express gratitude, to inspire others, and to grow personally. Hesitation steals our moments of courage and replaces them with regret.
Grandpa Joe: A Legacy of Being a DO-ER
My grandfather, Joe, was much more than a relative. He was a father figure and a shining example of what it means to be a man and a father. Despite tremendous challenges, including losing both legs below the knees, Grandpa Joe never let hesitation or physical limitations stop him from serving others.
When I was just eight years old, I witnessed something truly remarkable. Grandpa Joe, in pain and confined to prosthetic legs, would crawl out of bed to care for my grandmother, who was paralyzed on one side of her body. He didn’t wait for nurses or others to step in—he took action himself.
Grandpa Joe’s determination extended beyond his family. He walked the community looking for ways to serve, even driving neighbors to doctor’s appointments despite his disability. His life was a testament to being a doer—someone who takes responsibility and moves forward regardless of obstacles.
Years later, Grandpa Joe was awarded the Thomas Jefferson Servant Leadership Award, a prestigious recognition for outstanding public service. When I asked how I could win such an award, Grandpa's response was profound: “It’s not about the award. It’s about the impact. You have to make serving others part of who you are.”
Facing Fear and Choosing to Be a DO-ER
My journey from hesitation to bold action didn’t happen overnight. It took nearly a decade after my grandfather’s funeral before I joined my first speaking club in 2003. That first speech was terrifying. I walked into the room with sweaty palms and a dry mouth, feeling the familiar weight of hesitation on my shoulder. But this time, hesitation wasn’t alone—it brought along fear of rejection, fear of failure, procrastination, and self-doubt.
Despite the cacophony of doubts in my ear, I made a crucial choice. When my name was called, and I stood up, flicked hesitation off my shoulder, and faced the audience. Though those four minutes felt like four hours, I delivered my speech, and in that moment, I became a DO-ER.
What Does It Mean to Be a DO-ER?
In this case D.O.E.R., stands for:
Discipline: The commitment to face your fears even when you don’t feel ready.
Outcome: Being clear about what you want to achieve, focusing your mind on your desired results.
Eliminating Excuses: Shutting down the negative voices of hesitation, fear, and doubt that tell you why you can’t.
Responsibility: Taking full ownership of your actions, attitude, and decisions.
By embracing these principles, you shift from being a passive observer of your life to an active participant who shapes your destiny.
How Hesitation Manifests and How to Overcome It
Hesitation often appears disguised as self-doubt, fear of failure, procrastination, or even perfectionism. It’s that inner voice telling you to wait, to prepare more, or to avoid embarrassment.
Recognizing hesitation is the first step to overcoming it. Ask yourself:
What am I afraid will happen if I take action?
What opportunities might I miss if I don’t move forward?
Am I letting fear or doubt dictate my choices?
Once you identify hesitation, you can apply the D.O.E.R. framework:
Discipline: Commit to taking one small step today, no matter how uncomfortable.
Outcome: Visualize the positive result of your action to motivate yourself.
Eliminate Excuses: Challenge the negative thoughts and replace them with empowering affirmations.
Responsibility: Own your decisions and refuse to blame external circumstances.
The Power of Choice: Whose Hand Is on Your Shoulder?
I closed with a powerful question: Whose hand is on your shoulder right now? Is it hesitation? Fear? Doubt? Or perhaps it’s your future self, gently tapping you and saying, “Now is your time to be a doer.”
Every day presents countless choices. You can choose to stay seated, letting hesitation dictate your path, or you can stand up, flick that hand off, and move forward courageously. The difference between regret and fulfillment often lies in this simple decision.
Remember, hesitation not only costs time and missed opportunities but can also erode your confidence and sense of purpose. Don’t let it steal your story.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)
Why do we hesitate when faced with important decisions?
Hesitation often stems from fear of failure, fear of rejection, or uncertainty about the outcome. Our brains are wired to avoid risk, which can cause us to pause or avoid action to protect ourselves from potential negative experiences.
How can I build the discipline to overcome hesitation?
Building discipline starts with small consistent actions. Set achievable goals, create routines, and hold yourself accountable. Over time, facing fears in manageable steps strengthens your ability to act despite discomfort.
What if I fail after overcoming hesitation?
Failure is a natural part of growth and learning. Being a doer means accepting responsibility for your actions, including setbacks. Each failure is an opportunity to learn, adjust, and come back stronger.
How do I stop negative self-talk that causes hesitation?
Awareness is key. When you notice negative thoughts, challenge their validity and replace them with positive, affirming statements. Techniques like mindfulness, journaling, and affirmations can help reprogram your mindset.
Can hesitation ever be beneficial?
Yes, hesitation can sometimes serve as a moment to pause and evaluate risks carefully. However, when hesitation turns into chronic inaction driven by fear or doubt, it becomes detrimental.
Conclusion: Embrace the Doer Within You
Hesitation can be costly, but it doesn’t have to define your life. By learning from the inspiring example of Grandpa Joe and my personal journey, you can understand the power of discipline, clarity, eliminating excuses, and taking responsibility. These principles empower you to move beyond fear and doubt and become a DO-ER—someone who acts with purpose and impact.
Next time you feel that hand of hesitation on your shoulder, remember that you have the choice to flick it off and step forward. Your future self is waiting to thank you for it.